


Life or Death

by TheUltimateSimp0



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Modern Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Protective Levi Ackerman, Romance, Rough Sex, Sex, Top Levi Ackerman, aot - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-13 14:27:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29527776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheUltimateSimp0/pseuds/TheUltimateSimp0
Summary: Y/N is a survey corps commander who grew up in Marley. Levi and her are not" buddies" as that's what Hanji calls it. Y/N Argues with Levi. Little does she know, he has fallen in love with her.(It does contain spoilers for the original attack on Titan! Please don't read unless you have finished at least season 2 or are okay with spoilers)
Relationships: Levi Ackerman & Reader, Levi Ackerman/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3
Collections: Attack on Titan/Shingeki no Kyojin





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [No One special (FanfictionRoamer)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanfictionRoamer/gifts), [No one](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=No+one).



> Hey darlings, you can skip this part, saying it’s just important info like hair color and stuff.

(important info)

Y/N 

L/N 

H/C 

E/C 

{Be sure to leave any comments tell me how you feel! I want to make my readers happy! I will try my best to reply to questions!}


	2. Being a Captain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Explaining Y/N’s back story. There is more to come in her back story though!

If you were to ask me, "How long have you been like this?" I honestly couldn't tell you. Ever since I could have memories all I remember is being an asshole to people. I'm rude and stubborn. I refused to cry when I get hurt. I've never had my life flash before my eyes, nothing interesting I'm a normal human being in this hell hole. I haven't been wealthy, my mother died when I was born and my father, Well he sent me away on a ship to the titan land, I originally grew up in Marley, So I know what dangers lie there. I was found at a door step of a lady. I was raised there until I was eleven. Old enough to fight, according to my friends father, he trained me to be who I am now. He died from the fall of wall Maria. Once he made me spend a night in the so called "Underground" It honestly wasn't as bad as people think. Keep a low profile and you're gonna be fine. I found an ally way to sleep in and I crashed in a dumpster. It took Ryo two days to find me in the dumpster. I was thirteen when that happened. I remember almost being found by a man with black hair he was short but I was shorter than him. Made it easier to curl into the dumpster.

I joined the survey corps when I was eighteen, and promoted when I was nineteen. I had a bad history saying my parents grew up in the underground. I didn't let people know the real me. I used a fake last name and no one ever knew. My brother joined the survey corps and died. I was taught the strong survive and the weak, well they die. Ryo made me go off my brothers mistakes and he trained me. I was hopeful and turned out amazing. I do think of Ryo as weak sometimes saying that he died in the breach of wall Maria. I go off his mistakes too. 

"Y/n! Are you even listening!" Commander Erwin bangs the table to get my attention it startles Hanji but neither me or Levi. I look at Erwin and roll my eyes. 

"Yeah, this wholeee time." I say back to him. 

"Really? What did I just say?" He reply's back and makes a stern face. His face meaning he's tired of my bullshit. 

"Blah Blah blah, Cadets, Blah blah blah, recruits. Then you said-" Levi cuts me off as I was finishing my sentence. 

"You get to make the speech for the new recruits." Levi says. 

"Oh, really? fun! I won't scare them off like Erwin did last time! Do you remember Hanji? No one stayed because of Erwin!" I say laughing. 

"Yeah I do remember a full grown man having a mental breakdown because of him!" Hanji and me laugh vigorously. Erwin looks at me and Hanji and we both sit right back up. 

"Alright that's all now, Meeting dismissed!" Erwin says as we make our way back to our rooms some people call them offices because there's a desk on the back wall right as you walk in. Theres a bed on the right side pushed against a wall, and a dresser on the left. You also have another door leading to a bathroom. It's a rectangle and there's a sink. Towels on top of shelfs. A shower with a drain on the floor. It's not much but it's all I need. Levi's room is on the right side of mine and Hanji's on the left side Erwin's room is on the left of Hanji's. The room have sound barriers so everyone can focus on work. Erwin has the biggest room because his is a room to himself and an office in a separate one. He also had his own bathroom. 

I got to my room and I thought about who I was gonna recruit to my squad I already have Akito pretty bright personality, he has blonde hair and blue eyes. He's 6'0 and taller than me. He towers over me. It's creepy but he's strong. Then I have Ahyma she has black hair and it's about to her shoulders. She's 5'3 same height as me. Eichi is pretty cool guy too he's nice and all but he seems weak so I'll probably get an extra member because of him. He's wise but not strong he has brown hair and is 5'11. Then theirs Sayuri. She's nice but she's also oblivious I had to save her once. She's 5'5, white hair. She's the only minor in our squad. she's seventeen. I grab night time clothes out of my dresser. I grab tights and a white button up. I go to my shower and grab a towel. I put my clothes down on the dresser and turn the shower on. It's only cold water but it feels good. I was outside the majority of the day training so feeling the cold water drawing over my body feels amazing. 

I'm enjoying my calming shower until Levi comes into the main room. I've been here so long that I know that it's Levi's foot steps. He knocks on the bathroom door. I don't answer because honestly it's gonna be way more funny if I don't. He walks in covering his eyes.

"You realize it's 10:00 at night right? All electric shut off including showers." Levi says to me. 

"But the showers aren't electric!" I say in a joking tone. 

"You know what I mean Y/N now go to bed!" He says in a chilling tone.

I step out of the shower being butt naked. While Levi's still half way out the door.

"Goodnight"He turns around and walks out. 

Why did he walk out I didn't say it back! How rude! 

I remember that I'm naked. 

Oh yeahhhhh! I giggle to myself while getting changed back into my regular night time clothes. I go back into my room and jump into my bed. I lay down thinking of who I'm gonna recruit again. I think I'll recruit Sasha Braus. She seems funny, she might be a foodie, but I do need a back up for Eichi so, I'll get her. I only want one so, Sasha that's it. 

What happens to the other recruits whodunit get recruited into a squad, I think it sucks for them because they're with whoever calls them on the expeditions.

I plop onto my pillow and I cover myself with my cotton blanket. I dream of fond memories of climbing trees and writing in a journal. I usually wrote about the things I hate. Things I despise, and one of them was a boy named James. He was the worst, I hated him. He didn't bully me but he was weak as hell. So I wrote his name down, and explained what I hated about him. Then after thinking of that I fall right asleep.


	3. New day, New scouts!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N makes a speech to the new scouts. There is something off about these recruits though...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also disclaimer! I don't own any characters of the original show Attack on Titan! Have a great day!}

"Y/N Get up! We have to get up and get ready for the day! You also have to plan you're speech!" I wake up to Hanji stating over me with smiles her face. I could tell she's excited. 

"Hanji, I was up my eyes were just closed." I put my hands over my head to block the sunlight coming from my window. "Why'd you open a window Hanji? You know I don't like the morning sun!" I say to her with a more tired stern voice. 

"I thought it was a special day! So I opened it for you!" She sounds so excited so I let her have her moment. After she was done talking about sawny and bean she walked out and waved bye to me. 

After that I jumped out of my bed and started getting ready for the day. I put on my Survey corps uniform and headed out to go make tea. I was walking down the hallway and saw Levi. He bumped into me so I pushed him back. 

"Rude! Say sorry when you bump into people idiot!" I say to him. 

"You're the one who pushed me!"He says back to me in his cold toned voice. 

"Liar! Liar! Pants on fire!" I Yell to him. I may be a adult but I'm still a child by heart. 

"I'm not a liar!" We kept bickering until a few minutes later Erwin came by and stopped us. 

"What the hell you too? Is it impossible for you guys to get along?" Erwin says to us while we were standing side by side being scolded. 

"Sorry Commander." We both salute and walk our separate ways. Of course I walk to the kitchen because I have yet to make my tea! I was also really craving tea that morning so I was speed walking down the hall way. After a few minutes I get to the cafeteria and see Ahyma with tea for me and her. 

"Hi Captain Y/N! I made you tea, come sit!" She waves her hand showing me a sign to sit. I walk over to her and sit across from her. 

"Usually it's Sayuri who makes my morning tea. What's up?" I ask her. 

"Well, I needed to talk to you about, I don't know how to say this..." She says in a questioning tone. 

"Just spit it out Ahyma!" I imply to her. 

"Okay fine, well there's rumors of you, you know, smoking," She says to me in more of a whisper tone than usual. It's frowned upon here if you smoke, it's seen as unhealthy and well, it's frankly not good for you're lungs. It's not as bad if u drink but it's still pretty bad. You probably will be seen as a disgrace if you drink cheap wine or something. I couldn't care less about that. But Only I know I smoke. Usually if I'm having a bad night I sneak out and smoke outside of my window. I've always kept my guard up. I have to deny it so I won't get kicked out. 

"Well, Ahyma, I have never touched a cigarette," I lie straight to her face. I'm used to lying, I've lied my whole life. I could always get away with anything. Maybe murder if I really wanted to. 

"Oh thank god! I thought the rumors were true!" She lets out a deep breath. I laugh, trying to act natural. "Well drink up! It's my mothers special recipe!" Ahyma says to me. I drank one sip of that tea and I'm gonna be honest it tasted like shit. I try to hide my sour face. 

"It's great Ahyma! Good job!" I lie to her again. Honestly I feel a little bad but, I don't want to be mean. I let her have her moment. She gets all excited, and finished her tea quick and went to go train. After she was gone I got up and went to the kitchen and poured it out in the sink. 

Then I hear someone approaching me from behind. They put their hands on my shoulders. Not in a threatening, it was a way that a mother would do to their child to calm them down.

"Y/N, are you okay?" It was a worried but cold toned voice. It made shivers go up my spine.

"Levi?" I turn around and see Levi standing behind me.

"You were shivering, it looked like you were sick," He says to me back to his normal cold voice.

"I'm not shivering!" I lie to him even though it's clear that I am. I wasn't shivering because I was sick, I was shivering because someone almost figured out I smoked. I would've gotten kicked from the survey corps. 

"You're lying straight to my face Y/N why are you shivering?" He says to me. He has a worried look in his eye but his voice is still as cold as stone. 

"Levi, it's nothing I promise." I push Levi aside and walk out of the kitchen. I can feel the males cold glare on my back. I walk to my room to prepare my speech for the new scouts. 

I finish up my speech and look at the time. It was 5:33. I figured I could get some sleep figuring that the speech was at 8:00. So I set my alarm and fell asleep without a thought. 

~

I woke up at 7:30. I was still tired so I stretched but then my stomach rubbed against something in front of me. Figuring it was the wall I didn't think much of it. Then I realized that I was sleeping my back to the wall. I quickly jumped up from my slumber to see Levi sleeping in front of me. I thought that Levi was stubborn.

He looks so adorable while he's sleeping though. 

No crap! What am I thinking that's so weak of me to think. I can't believe myself so I push Levi out of the bed and he lands on the floor. He opened his eyes and saw me on the bed and him on the floor. 

"Brat why'd you push me off? You're the one who grabbed my hand and pulled me into you're bed." Levi says to me making eye contact. 

"You're such a liar! I did not I was sleeping!" I say to him with a voice of denial.

"I came into your room to check if you were ready and looked of you're bed then you grabbed my hand and pulled me into bed with you, who's the liar now?" He says to me with a smile that could burn someone's soul. He gets up and climbs back into my bed except this time, I was against the wall cris cross and he sat across from me imbed His legs were in a kneeling position. He was a very intriguing man. He kissed me on the check. 

"What the hellll-" I said to him while holding my check and blushing. 

"Nothing you looked cute like that," He says to me getting up and going to my door frame.

"Bye Y/N," He says while leaving the room and not saying anything more. 

~

I finished doing my hair and got ready to go make the speech. I went out of my room and went to go on the carriage with Hanji, Levi, and Erwin on the carriage already. I got into the carriage and it started going. I sat by Hanji Levi sitting across from me. Everyone was very happy. I said my speech in my head again memorizing it. Soon enough we got there and we were back stage and finally I went up stage to say my speech. Everyone who was there saluted and I started talking. 

"New recruits of Pardis. I want you to think about something. Are you willing to lay down you're life for the sake of you're friends?" 

Everyone looked at each other worried. The only one who didn't look at each other was a blonde haired man. He looked familiar. Like someone from my childhood in Marley before I was sent. I brushed it off. Everyone started my mumbling. 

"Okay, next question, are you willing to lay down you're life for you're family?" 

Everyone once again looked at each other and mumbled. 

"Last question, if you were the key to the Titans being gone and we had to kill you for them to disappear, Would you let me kill you?" I ask them.

They all look at me like I'm insane. Well they're right if they think I am insane. Cause I am. 

"If not, then I suggest you leave. There's only about a half percent chance you'll survive the first expedition. The only reason you're here is either because someone you loved died or you're here for the sake of humanity. Unless you're here because you'd like to look strong. If you're here for the last reason leave. Once again if you're willing to give you're heart for humanity then give it till you reach you're last breath, anyone who would like to join the other regimens then you may leave now." 

Many people start exiting the so called arena. There is some who stay. One of them is the recruits I wanted but I think I'll wait until she gets stronger. 

"Captain, I think you over did it, no ones gonna stay now!" Akito says to me with a worried look in his eyes. Everyone of the survey corps who was standing behind stage watching me looked worried except Erwin and Levi. 

"Akito, if they're not willing to dedicate their hearts then they don't deserve to be here." I say to him with a stern voice. Akito backs up behind Erwin. 

There is few people who stay. 

"Those who stayed, welcome to the scout regimen, dedicate you're hearts." I say to them. I walk behind stage. I fall into Levi's arms. Like a trust fall. I giggle.

"That was tiring," I fall asleep in Levi's arms. The last thing I remember before I fell asleep was Levi picking me up bridal style and bringing me to the carriage and staying there with me.

~

When I woke up the carriage was moving and we were half way back to the dorms. Levi was holding me in his lap like I was a baby. Hanji and Erwin were sitting on the other side. I woke up but didn't get up out of Levi's arms. So I woke up but I stayed in Levi's arms. After We got to the dorms Erwin and Hanji got out went to their bedrooms. Levi got out with me and was holding me in front of him like I was a baby. I was leaning over his shoulder. He put my into his bed and he got in bed with me. 

We were both tired so we fell right asleep. Levi snuggling me like a bear hug.


	4. Days Passing quick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> {I honestly don’t know what to put here anymore so Ima just leave it blank}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> {Also TW for this chapter. It contains abuse from their backstory}

woke up to Levi. Already standing up. 

"Are you going to get up or no?" Levi says keeping any piece of emotion off his face. 

"I am upppp!" I say in a funny tone. 

"You know meant. Now cmon Hanji wants us," he said in his usual tone.

I quickly got up and got dressed in front of Levi. He looked at me and bit his lip. I looked back at him. 

"What?" I ask him. 

"Nothing" He turns around and crosses his arms. 

That's the thing people don't get. I've always been insecure about my body. Since I was thirteen, the girl who had raised me, Anne Suzuki. She tried to marry me with men who were in there late twenty's. At fifth teen she made me date a man who was seventeen turning eighteen. I was attractive when I was young. I still was. My Long h/c hair went down to my back and apparently that was attractive. She'd starve me since I was apparently fat. I wasn't though I only weighed ninety pounds. When he tries to propose to me I refused and he broke ties between us. I was satisfied that he was gone but she was pissed at me. She didn't let me eat for four days. Only water. 

After that she made me date another guy he was nineteen and I was sixteen. I guess it wasn't as bad as an age difference but still. I hated him though he abused me and slashed me in the back with a whip. I still have the scars. When I was with Ryo, he saw the marks on my arms he found the man and beat him to death. I will forever thank Ryo for that. 

After that guy was done for there was one last guy. His name was Sora Sato. He was the worst out of all three. When we first meet he was the nicest guy and I thought he was different. Probably because Anne was around. It wasn't like she cared though, if he was nice or not. When she wasn't around he made sure to make me feel horrible. He cut me with a knife almost every time Anne wasn't around. He cut me on the back of my neck once and I kept scratching the the cut because it was deep and it itched. When me and Ryo were training he noticed and made me show him the back of my neck. The next time me and Sato were together. Ryo sneaked through the window and stabbed him in his arm, he escaped that night and I still haven't found him. I was crying and after that Ryo talked to Anne and she stopped trying to Marry me to men. All she wanted from me was kids. 

After that Ryo cut my hair for me, so I could forget the memories. After Anne found out she was pissed but she didn't dare to do anything. She knew if she did something Ryo would find out. Most likely he would kill her if she did anything else. 

I'm pretty sure Levi saw the one scar on my stomach from Sato. He probably didn't want to ask about it though. I finished getting ready and then we were on our way to go get Hanji. When I got there I saw one of the new recruits. I had read his file. His name was Eren. He wasn't with Mikasa which I thought was surprising but Hanji was watching him with excitement. 

"LEEEEEEVI! YOU MADE IT! AND Y/N'S HERE TOO!" Hanji screamed for us to come over where she was experimenting with Eren. 

"Haha yeah Hanji!" I ran to Hanji's side and looked at Eren. "What's so special about a teenage boy?" 

"He is a Titan shifter!" Hanji says in they're cheerful voice like they always have. 

"What's a Titan shifter? I've never heard about those," I ask Hanji.

"He can turn in and out of a Titan form." Levi says in his cold tone voice while approaching me and Hanji.

"Yeah! Exciting right Y/N!" They say to me.

"Very," I say in a laughing kinda tone. "Why do you want us again Hanji?" I say to them.

"Don't you wanna witness history!" Hanji says in a excited voice.

"Yeah but I just woke up and I'm tired, I want tea," I say to them.

"Fine! If you don't wanna stick around that's fine with me!" Hanji says while crossing her arms and making a face. 

"I'll stay around," I say to Hanji with a more annoyed face with usual. 

Eren looks scared. He has a white button up and the same jeans we have on. He looks like he just got out of jail. Hanji goes up to him.

"Can you shift now!" Hanji says.

"I c-can tr-y-y" Eren says in a shaky tone. 

Hanji backs up and pushes me back with her. Levi follows. Hanji gives Eren a thumbs up and he bites his hand. Then he turned into a Titan. I had always thought Titans were ugly. His Titan was not as ugly. It was still ugly though.

He quickly got out and his Titan form and fell to the floor. He looked tired so I ran to him remembering how I felt the day Sato cut a scar onto my back. My terrified face, silently screaming inside my head. 

I knelt down to Eren's side and he looked up at me. I see myself in him. Just from the look in his eyes I can understand how much trauma he's had. 

"Hanji," I say looking back down at him, still the same expression I had on that day. "I don't think he's ready for this yet..." 

Eren nodded at me and Hanji looked back and fourth between me and him. Eren still looked terrified. 

I got up from the disgusting flesh of the Titan and start walking away from Hanji. Hanji looked back at me confused and Levi quickly caught up to me. We both walked into the head quarters. 

"Hey Levi, do you know how to cook?" I ask him. I hadn't had my tea this morning and I was hangry. 

"I don't know I haven't cooked in a long time," He reply's in his usual expressionless tone.

"Well we're going to try because I'm hungry!" I say putting my hands on my hips. 

"Whatever you want," Levi reply's to me.

We march our way toward the kitchen. 

Once we got there, I grabbed two aprons that were hanging on the cabinets. I put the white one around me and tie it. The other one I put around Levi and I tie it around him. 

"You realize I coulda done that by myself..." He says to me, most likely questioning my niceness today. The truth was that I just wanted to be "nice" today. That probably wasn't going to happen but I could try.

{I'm sorry for stopping it right here but I hope you guys are enjoying the story so far, and I'm sorry it took so long for this part to get out, I've had to study for tests and I've been falling asleep while writing this part.} 

"Yeah I totally knew that Levi!" I roll my eyes, sarcasm showing how I was laughing. 

"Well, what do you want to make?" he asks me his tone, like always, staying the same. 

"We should make a cake!" I say excitedly. 

"For who? Is it you're birthday?" He asks me awkwardly. 

"No, I just want cake!" I started to get upset, I was fawking hungry.

"I'll go see if we have the ingredients," He walks away goes to get flower, and all the other ingredients. I rush over to him to grab the ingredients out of his hands, I could tell he was about to drop it. 

"You have to tell people when you need help Levi!" I say to him walking back to the counter and putting stuff down. 

"I didn't need help you just came over to help me," he says denying my statement. 

"Fine whatever you say," I roll my eyes and get a bowl out of the cabinet below us, while I'm down there I always grab a spoon. 

~Random time skip because I don't feel like writing a whole paragraph about baking a cake lmao sorry~

After we finished mixing the cake mix, throwing it into a pan and putting it in the oven, the kitchen was a mess, and I could tell by Levi's expression he was not very pleased. 

"Tch, how do you manage to make a kitchen this messy Y/N?" he asks me. 

"Have fun cleaning Levi!" I walk away to go visit my room for a change of clothes, even though I was wearing an apron I still go a bunch of flower on my pants and shirt. 

"Y/N! Get you're ass back here right now!" Levi yells at me, me being already being halfway out of the kitchen give a slight smile to Levi and book it out of there. 

~~~~~~~~

After a few stares from cadets standing in the hallway, two of them being Eren and Mikasa, I finally got to my room and slammed my door. 

I laugh to myself about how I'm gonna die when I get back to Levi. I looked at the time, the small clock on my dresser beside my bed tells me it's 8:43. Nine is when we all go to bed. I'm changing out of my uniform into my night clothes. When I finish changing I hear my door open. Levi standing in my doorway. 

"You're welcome for cleaning up that mess brat," He says to me coming into my room, closing the door behind him.

"Why are you here?" I ask in a stern voice looking at him. 

"Well I'm here because-" He cuts off his sentence grabs my hand and runs down the hallway into his office. Levi had a bigger room than me and Hanji. His room contained two big doors with dim lighting and a desk. A few decorations, maybe some plants and stuff but it Wasn't much. He also had a door to his regular room. His room was plain, a spotless white bedsheet, and four pillows stacked neatly side by side and his bed, pushed against a wall like mine. He had a fire place at the end of his room, and a carpet in the middle. He also had another door but it was a glass door, it was the door to his bathroom. He has a glass shower with stainless marble floors.

Once we were in his main bedroom he sat me on his bed and tended to the fire place and got down on his knees to fix the wood.

"You realize last night you were screaming, about this girl named Anne, and a boy named Sat-" I cut him off. 

"Don't say that name." I say to him looking down at my feet. I was shaking. I put my hands on my knees my head still low. 

"Is there something that happened with him?" he asks me in the softest tone of voice I've heard from him. 

I didn't answer. 

"Y/N, answer me. What the hell happened with him. " Levi said in a more stern voice this time. 

I still didn't answer. Honestly, I didn't want to tell him the story, not because I didn't trust him, I was scared he would think I was weak. 

"Y/N. Answer me god damnit!" He'd stood up and yelled at me. Like he was angry with me. His room was far enough away from everyone else's so no one could hear us. 

"I'm sorry Levi," I started crying. Silently so no one could hear not even Levi. My hair covering my stream of tears from my eyes. I put my hands on my eyes so I could wipe away the tears but they just kept coming. I let out a sniffle and that's when Levi came over to me and knelt on one knee. He wiped the hair out of my face. 

"Y/N, stop crying, I don't know how deal with people crying." He said to me wiping away my tears for me. He stood up and sat beside me on his bed. His fire pit cracking. He hugged me. I hugged him back. 

After a few minutes of staying like that me crying on his shoulder. He got up and changed into his night time clothes which were pants and a white button up. 

I was wearing a black cardigan and a white undershirt, with short shorts. 

He changed and hopped into bed with me. He hugged me under his chin and we both feel asleep.


End file.
